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I believe in Hope and Faith.
With true Faith, Hope will comes.
With Hope, Faith will bloossm.
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TO KNOW MORE ABOUT ME: go to Profile
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8:47 PM
It has been a bad few days. I'm now down with a serious cough and starting to feel feverish. In addition, my PC is down and so I probably won't be blogging in the next few days...
So if any one of you wishes to contact me, please sms me or call me. As there are times where I would forget to switch my mobile phone back from slient mode, my replies back to you may not be prompt. Like to apologise that in advance... Hope that I can be back blogging soon.
2:13 PM
It has been a eventful day for me today. There are lots of things that I could write in this entry today. There's Peijun's 21st birthday party and the wonderful cooking by her mum; the food fair that I went with Sis and Yichao; the wonderful Breakback Mountain that we watched; the trance music that got Sis so excited while we're having our dinner... In any normal circumstances, I would be so spoilt for choices at the many things I can write about. But not today... Today I would like to use this opportunity to say something to a particular someone...
To that someone:
Out of genuine concern, I asked and heard about how you are doing through a friend. If what that friend said is true, that you have walked out from the dark shadow of your past, I like to sincerely say to you: "Congrats!!" Knowing that you are doing fine and that you are even living your life happier and better, I can't help but feel elated for you. Many a times I liked to call and ask how you are doing, but somehow somewhat, I lacked the courage to ask or couldn't find the right opportunity to do so... I'm a clusmy man. There are times where, despite my concern, I do not know where to start and how to start. So please forgive me if I seems elusive. I just want you to know that my care and concern for you have never change a single bit as compared to the past.
Knowing that you are doing well brings me tremedous joy. All that matters to me now, is that all my friends are doing well and are happy with their lives. I really don't know if you still read my blog, or if you realised that this blog entry is dedicated to you, but hopefully someone who knows it will be kind enough to send my regards to you.
Lately, I heard some of my close friends saying that they sense a change in me. Some said that I'm now a more positive person, some said that I grown a lot... I cannot be my own judge, but if what they said are true, then it probably means that I'm heading towards the right direction. I definitely feel happier as a person. And that's because, like you, I've learnt to walk away from the dark past and look forward to a brighter future. I can now see a wider view of things which was blind to me then. To know that a close friend, who holds a special place in my heart, are also experiencing the same kind of happiness like me simply warms me.
Due to our own committment, we haven't been meeting up as much as I would have preferred. I seriously miss you. Sometimes, life can be really strange. Despite being so near, yet we seems to be so far apart. However, I guess the most important thing is, we all still care for each other's well-being. As long as that remains, no matter how far apart we may be or how little time we may be spending together, we will be fine.
Hope to see you soon. And when that day comes, let's celebrate our own personal growth and the embracement of the renew sense of purpose and happiness in our lives. Till then, see ya!!
Best Regards,
Mudskipper.
4:03 AM
Finally, I can complete a full training without having to endure back pains. After going through numerous training, today's the best in term of my physical conditions endurance. Ran around 10km at Labador Park, enjoying the breeze and watching the sun set. Beautiful!! Of course, it seems beautiful to me because first and foremost, I can truly said that at last I can enjoy a painless run. Hopefully this will continue for the rest of the trainings till the competition.
Although I've managed to get my body into running conditions, I'm still not happy with my timing. Today's timing was few mins short of an hour. Too too too too too slow!! Although its a hell lot better compared to the first training, but taking into consideration I was running in pain then, today's timing is a bit of a disappointment. I guess I've to take it step by step. Haha!! I've faith that I'll achieve my goal!!
Learning is never ending.
The moment you think you know everything,
That will be the time you'll loss something.
Gaining knowledge is not the same as gaining wisdom.
One's gain wisdom through enlightenment,
While one gain knowledge through continuous learning.
I may never become a wise man,
But you can bet I'll want to grow into a learned man.
12:01 AM
Love comes and go,
Especially when we are all seeking for the Right One.
Falling in and out of love is part and parcel of life;
Knowing to let go and carry on with our life
Is just as important as starting a relationship.
When love sours and fade,
It hurts.
The pain is unbearable and nothing in the world seems to matter anymore.
However, the correct attitude is to treat every failed relationship as a valued lesson.
Yes, you can be sad and cry.
But we must all learnt to stand up and look forward in life.
Love is important, but it shouldn't be our sole focus.
There are lot more things in life which requires our attention.
Family, friends, studies, work, oneself
So many important things and people are surrounding us,
yet we often foolishly neglect them...
Looking back, I was also a fool not so long ago.
I let myself to be submerge into a world of hopelessness
Just because of a relationship that was never meant to be.
A loss of trust over one person manifested into a distrust on everyone.
Like a cancerous growth,
It simply eats my life away.
However, time has once again proven to be a wonderful medicine.
I'm now cured of the disease,
Even though I had to took a hell lot of dosages to recover.
Like I mentioned before,
I'm now a much happier person.
Not because I've escaped from the shackles of love,
But rather I now know how to let go and at the same time,
Once again looking forward to love.
Being single and yet happy,
I'm now better able to look after the people I care about.
I can now push myself to achieve my personal dreams.
I'm not bitter about love and choose not to be loved.
Instead, I'm awaiting for love and using this period to polish myself,
So as to glow and shine when that day comes.
To all my friends who are now blissfully in love:
Treasure the one who is now beside you.
Its fate that brought both of you together and do not let it go to waste.
A little bit of concern,
A little bit of compromise,
A little bit of patient,
A little bit understanding,
Can go a long way in ensuring the love you both share
Blossom and last for eternally.
Don't be complacent,
Don't take it for granted.
Caused when love withered and die,
It not only pains you,
But also to the one you loved so dear.
To all my friends who are still recovering from break-ups:
I shared your sorrow and pain.
You must have wondered how did it end up this way?
Many questions seems unanswered.
You may even begin to loss faith in love.
However we mustn't indulge in self-pity,
Nor shall we loss our focus in life.
Let the pain toughen us up.
Treat the bitterness as a medicine.
They are so many people around you who cares about you.
And precisely because they care about you,
they also shared in your unhappiness and pain.
Why let those who truly love you suffered in pain as well?
Stand up and cheer up!!
Let the past go and build a better future with us true friends.
Have faith that a better someone is just around the corner...
To all my friends who are like me, free and happy:
This is an important phrase of our lives.
This is the time to build ourselves to be better individuals.
We must share our joy with others spread the happiness to them.
We must be sensitive to those who are less fortunate than us.
Let's give them a hand and reach to the pedestal we are now in.
And if you are also awaiting for love like I do,
Be sure to know that I'm always praying for you.
Because your success in finding your true love,
Will be an actual prove and confident boost for me,
that my day won't be far away...
11:18 PM
Went to Sis's 21st BBQ birthday party. Was slightly disappointed that some of our friends were unable to make it... (you know who you are... kana sai!!), but at least the BBQ was enjoyable. The weather was cooling, perfect for BBQ. Besides that, the location of the pit was good too, near the washroom and the lighting was bright and clear. Best of all... most dun need to BBQ at all, just wait to be serve!! Haha!! The tough job of preparing and BBQing the food goes to Yichao and his friend Jonathan and another tall guy who never talk to me. I must admit, its one of the most organised and better food serve in most BBQ outing that I had. Personal favourite? Have to be the muchroom!! Haha!!
Brought a big Taz Devil for Sis. Hope that she like it and can hug that 笨笨 looking Taz to sleep every night!! So dear Sis, you are now offically an young adult le. There will be greater responsibilities ahead of you. So must jia you orh!! I'll be there supporting you all the way.
The star of the day!! Leona cutting the cake with a radiant smile on her face.
The chefs!! The guy in black is the one that I mentioned that never talks to me. The guy in red is Yichao. Let's give credit to these guys for making the BBQ a success!!
Me and Sis. Of course I won't miss the opportunity to take pics with my dearest sis! May all her dreams come true!!
The SD group photo. From the left: Yong Kang, Germaine, Evvone, Siyin, Sihui, Leona, Ben, Peijun, Mudskipper and Geraldine.
Just a small footnote: After Germaine, Ben and Yong Kang subsequently got off the cab as we went back home together, I had a small chat with the cab driver. The driver was surprised that we're university students and thought that we look much younger than our age and mistaken us for poly student. I guess it shows either: One, we look too childish and the driver was just trying to be nice. Or two, we show actual prove that by dedicating ourselves to gakkai activities and having strong faith in Gohonzon, we are able to become truly happy people and that kind of true happiness brings about a youthfulness about us the nobody can fail to see. I hope and like to believe its the latter...
Youth does not necessary bring forth happiness,
But true happiness will definitely bring forth a youthful spirit,
Which can last longer than youth itself,
Forever and ever.
8:40 AM
Isn't this baby adorable!! This baby boy is the child of my colleague, and now proud mum, Tricia. Went to her house to today, where she and her husband organised a buffet party to celebrate the one month old birthday of their new family addition. You can sense the happiness in their life with the radiant and smile on their faces whenever they talked about the funny incidents in taking care of their child.
I'm not sure if all one-month babies are like that, but Tricia's baby (let's called him J for short) sure is hyper-active. Noticed the lady carrying J? Well for your information, that wasn't Tricia but another colleagues of mine, Jennifer. Throughout the period while Jennifer was carrying J, J did not cry nor make a fuss. Instead, he just lays on Jennifer's experienced arm (among all of us colleagues, she is the only with baby experience as she's already a mother of two beautiful teenage girls), his eyes looking intently at Jennifer most of the times. As he gets comfortable, he starts what Tricia called the J's regular stretching exercise. J will start to stretch his hands, legs and body, making very noise. It was a really funny sight!! According to Jennifer, one-month old babies are still unable to see clearly, and thus wasn't able to recognise nor remember the things that they saw. Instead, they are attracted by sounds and bright lights. That's the reason why J's wasn't crying when carried by a stranger. As for the attraction to sound, you can clearly see J's stops stretching when we starts talking nosily in a group!! J's is just so plain adorable!!
We were all discussing, how magical and amazing a tiny life like J's will one day grew to a adult like you and I. In my own opinion, humans are most beautiful when they are at their infant stage. Every single movement and every single sound that a baby makes seems so delicate and graceful. And when they fall asleep, they will become the true sleeping beauty. I can bet with anyone, the way we look after we fall asleep pale in comparison to a baby. In fact, I think we should be grateful that we don't like idiots while we sleep!!
The beginning of a new life,
A start of an unknown life adventure.
The magic ends here.
With our hands,
We shall build a better future for them.
Nothing will be magical,
Just pure hard work and perserverance,
And lots of love and concern.
Their success in life will be a reflection of our success,
And their failure also represents our failure.
1:59 AM
Today is the commence of the running practice that my company has insist on all employees to take part. This is to get us ready for the JP Morgan 5.6km run on April and also the 10km Standard Chartered Marathon in December. For someone who has not been running ever since the eye infection I suffered last October (due to lack of motivation and also the break of the momentum), the practice today was really tough for me. The 4km run today takes us to and fro from our workplace to Sentosa's entrance gate. Well... to say I'm running, it is probably more appropriate to say I'm jog-walking. Without running regularly, in addition to the stupid back pain I always felt when I ran, suddenly asking me to run 4km is probably too much for my body. I was still running pretty smoothly for the first 1km plus, however, when my back pain starts to react, it really kills me!! That's when I started to jog, hopping that the pain will ease away. Well, that didn't happen and by the time I reached Harbour Front, I was really struggling and started to walk instead. From then on, it a constant changing of walking to jogging, depending on how much I can take the pain. Anyway, based on my breathing, I guessed even without the pain, I will still be struggling running all the way for the 4 km.
During the period when I was running regularly, overcoming the pain barrier is much more easier as compared to now. So it really shows how a lack of constant practice will result in a drop in strength and stamina. Anyway, this is a good opportunity for me to starts building up my stamina and also to shed some weight again. With the company run held twice a week, in addition to the extra one day run I'm gonna impose on myself , I'm determined to get my body into competitive shape for December 10km run. Although its still unknown if I'll still be an employee for the company come December (my current contract runs till June), I'm still keen to take part in the competition as an individual. JP Morgan may be too short a time for me to be fully prepared for it, so I guess I'll use that competition as a guage to see how much I've improved.
Actually, to be perfectly honest, I really hate running. Basically, I love sports, but I never considered running a sport. It more like a torture to me!! Basketball, soccer, hockey etc, these are real sports. Running is just part of an routine in sports. How can anyone considered running as a sport?!?! However, I do believe running can help to train my mental toughness (this may not apply to nature athletics as running is as simple as eating to them....). I was never good at running distances and the only thing that kept me going in the past was to constantly psycho myself to keep running and not stopping. A mind over body thingy I guessed. This is especially true when my back pain starts to react. It really hurts like hell!! Everytime I finished a run (that is when I really put in the full effort to run without stopping), you will see me laying on the floor panting and wringing in pain. Its so bad that the only things that consume my mind at that moment is the pain that I feel at my back. Not the feets, the legs or the bursting lungs... just the stupid back. If only my back wasn't not so problematic, it would have been easier for me to stay motivated and run more regularly than compared to now. Because in the end, no sane person likes to be in pain... (ok... if you like pain, sorry, you're from another planet. Most probably from the same planet where Lance Armstrong came from!!).
1:06 AM
Today was a really busy day at work. Due to the company system going through an upgrade process yesterday, I was unable to do anything much before lunch. Hence, things pile up and in my line, when that happens, be prepared to go on a mad rush the next day if you are responsible enough to clear your work. As it is, I had to clear the KIV stuff that was left undone yesterday and also the new things that are thrown into my direction.
However, I like to make my stand clear. Despite the pressure that I felt in my work (Heck!! Which job has no stress?!?!), I love my work very much. I may sometimes complained about this and that to some of you poor souls out there (you know who you are... Thanks a million!!), however I'm happily accepting this pressure that I've got. Put it in this pespective: I rather be busy and feeling the pressure of work than laze around doing nothing or working mudane stuff that does not give me any challenges. Of course, too much of a pressure is not good. However, I've not reached that stage where its driving me crazy. I liken to equate pressure as responsiblility, and to be given responsibility means one is being trusted to accomplish what they have been tasked to do. I craved for this type of trust. To be given the responsibility to accomplish certain difficult task give me a sense of importance within the company. I love the challenges and it gives me purpose in life. I remembered a friend, who misunderstood me that I was feeling down, told me that my current situation is one which I choosen and should live with it. He was partly right though. The path that I'm now walking is indeed my choice but the only difference is I've never regretted it. Not a single bit. I not the kind of person who will cry over spilled milk. I'll continue walk the path I choosen without looking back and work my way around the unexpected obstacales. So my dear friends, when I complained to you about how stress I feel, please do not think that I'm crying for help. The reason I'm sharing the pressure I felt at work with you is because I feel I can trust you and this also provide a out-let of pressure for me. You being patient enough to heard me out is the greatest help you can give me. I need no encouragement 'cause I'm self motivated enough in my work. Should the day come when I truly need help, I will be unashamefully saying it out. Hopefully, you won't run away from me then!! Haha!!
Faced your challenges in life,
With the fearlessness of a lion -
The king of beasts.
Do not look back with resentment and regret.
Instead, focus on the present and the future.
Because they are the one which will shape your life.
When you feel a sense of hopelessness and loss,
always stay positive and tell yourselves:
I'm already at the bottom of the pit,
the only way that I can go is up!!
When you've overcome the challenges and reach the summit of the mountains,
you will become a bright warm sun,
where you can lead and encourages others who are still struggling to reach their summit.
2:01 AM
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